How to ensure a miserable life

Who would want to make their life miserable, right? But did you know that most of us, knowingly or unknowingly, are actually more comfortable doing things that ensure our lives remain pathetic in the long run? For instance, we love lying down, eating what we want, and not doing challenging things. This article is actually about making sure you do it correctly. I mean, why not ensure you remain perfectly miserable all your life? After all, it’s what you love.  

As a writer/content creator, I bump into several articles and videos every day, but my mind controls what I read or watch. Therefore, most of the content I consume is the result of my online search. But this one’s weird. Thanks to this strange YouTube algorithm, I recently came across a video that suggests tips to make your life miserable. Here’s how I’d summarize the steps: 

  1. Wake up when you think it’s right—preferably at noon. Wear the same clothes for at least a week, personal hygiene is a “no” “no,” and procrastinate. Make sure you’re always busy with stuff that gives you joy. Think about your failures and get depressed, but make sure you’ll never worry about the things that may fix them. Go to bed at 3.
  2. Avoid challenges at work. Always pretend to be busy, but let people know you’re the most important person around. One of the most important things is to ensure you don’t help people but have time to spot tiny mistakes and make big issues. Never fix others’ errors even though you can. 
  3. Make sure you don’t need to learn anything new. Whatever you have inside your head is the epitome of human knowledge. Therefore, always ignore what others suggest. Instead, tell them you’re a fully grown person, so you know everything.
  4. Avoid conversations that may solve problems. If you can’t, ensure your point of view is always right. Dismiss others’ opinions and laugh at them for being ignorant. What you believe matters.
  5. When you’re done procrastinating, manage some time to worry about things you can’t control. Cuss at the politicians, famous people, history, and politically incorrect inventions. Produce at least thirty hate comments and distribute them across different platforms every day. 
  6. Never get inspired or impressed. Instead, criticize everything and everyone.

We all can argue what success looks like, but there might not be much disagreement regarding spotting a pity life. We all want a successful life, but most don’t prefer putting our brains and bodies in uncomfortable situations. Avoiding such situations ensures you remain miserable because you aren’t in shape or you haven’t settled.  

What if you enjoy challenges? What if you love making your body and mind work, so you achieve something? We are on this earth to act, not lay back and procrastinate. But of course, you want to make sure your life remains miserable.  

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